Pride has always been a warm blanket for me in the world wide storm of selfishness. I have ran into some really great people and am so grateful to be able to rub shoulders with them.
As I have looked over their accomplishments and have gotten to know them, I am completely bewildered as to why they are associated with me. I feel very intimidated by their success and accomplishments.
I feel like I'm just a poor, trashy individual with no ambitions or opportunities to make anything happen. As I look over my life for the past 5 years, I think... wow... I have accomplished nothing worth while. I've just lived day by day with no work towards any dreams or goals to live by.
The problem I see myself in is, I've never known how to live to those goals, because I've felt like there was no point other than to live one day at a time. My friends tell me that I have value, but I'm afraid I don't really see the value they claim that I have.
I'm not driven by the normal accomplishments of the hustle and bustle of life here... in fact, nothing really motivates me... I'm just a blob on a log with not real value but to just exist.
... it's ironic that I feel this way...
..... I'm not really sure how to get out of this...
.... I feel like nothing, because I don't have a lot of things to show for it. .....
