My Cruise!

Dear Delysia,

So, I forgot to tell you that I'm going on a cruise on Saturday of this week! SQUEAL! I am going to be gone from this Saturday to next Saturday! I fly into California this Friday to go visit with Traci. But as I shared with you earlier, I'm not sure that I want to see him. I have been thinking of late that friendship with me isn't as important. Yet, at the same time feel like I'm being overly dramatic! I need to stop!

So I am so excited though. I have been watching the movie Titanic and it's been hilarious! It sort of freaks me out a bit. Granted I am only going to Mexico, so there aren't any icebergs, yet it makes me sort of uneasy going to a place where I'm not in control all that much.

I have also been stressing out a bit. I am headed to Cali on Friday to spend a day there. Yet, I'm just a little bit frazzled to get things together. I'm sort of a mess. I don't know whats wrong really. I should be happy, but so many things have changed in such a small amount of time.

I am happy and very grateful that I even get to go on a cruise. I have never been in a position where I could afford to go. Yet, today I am able to afford it and will be able to enjoy a time where I can experience international travel to Mexico. I've traveled internationally before, just not to Mexico.

A part of me wants to have a fling and enjoy a night or two with some stranger, yet it would be that the stranger would need to be on the ship. I want to experience a moment of passion. Yet, I'm not sure if that will happen. I want it to. I want some stranger to see me and find me attractive and wanting to talk to me and be with me.

I miss having friends that are pineapples. I need more friends to relate too. I'm afraid that Cory Beth, Traci, Boo Boo, the Coops are not much that I can relate with.... perhaps I am too wanting. Perhaps I should just enjoy things as they come.

....

I am very pleased and happy that I can go. It is a lifetime activity that I wouldn't have been able to help other wise. I have been very blessed to go! I am very blessed and very grateful!